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All Candles

THE ORIGINAL MALICIOUS CANDLES!
 Our bestselling candles are hand-poured in Snohomish, WA, and feature the realest, funniest, most unapologetic messages.
P.S. We also take custom orders!
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I'm Here To Save Your Ass, Not Kiss It!
$22.00
They Call Me Grandma Because 'Partner In Crime' Is Inappropriate.
$22.00
Go The Fuck To Sleep!
$22.00
Touch My Scissors And I'll Cut You
$22.00
Heading Down To Rock Bottom. Let Me Know If You Need Anything While I'm Out.
$22.00
Sober AF Candle
$22.00
Excel Is My Love Language
$22.00
Ugly Christmas Sweater Contest WINNER - Infused With: "No Shame. Like...None."
$22.00
Champion Gamer
$22.00
Run All The Miles, Drink All The Wine
$22.00
Having Me As An Employee Is Really The Only Gift You Need. Infused With "Exceeded Expectations!"
$22.00
There's Some Ho, Ho, Hos in This House! - Infused With: "Weak- Ass Presents"
$22.00
Happy Birthday!
$22.00
Optimism Sounds Exhausting
$22.00
You're Simply The Best!
$22.00
Doctor, It Still Hurts!
$22.00
Pregnant AF
$22.00
Water Witch
$22.00
Successful Military Marriage
$22.00
I Need A Joint!
$22.00
Here For the Girls, Gays, & Theys
$22.00
The Greatest Gift Our Parents Gave Us Was Each Other...Oh, And Crippling Anxiety.
$22.00
Project Plan-ning
$22.00
Bride Boss
$22.00
MENOPAUSE
$22.00
Deployment Life
$22.00
Thank You For Being A Friend!
$22.00
You Are Hotter Than This Candle! - Infused With "Raw 'Scent'uality"
$22.00
Shut Up Legs... We Got This!
$22.00
Sorry I Was Busy The Day You Moved.
$22.00
Thank You For Being My Shovel Friend
$22.00
Search Engine Self- Diagnoser
$22.00
Recreational AF Candle
$22.00
I Swear I Will Rip Off Your Arms And Beat You With Your Own...
$22.00
Look At Us! Killin' It In This Marriage Shit!
$22.00
Will You Hold My Dress While I Pee?
$22.00
Proud Parent Of A Dramatic Dog
$22.00
Instead Of Grandkids, May I Interest You In A Candle?
$22.00
You Can't Pray Me Away
$22.00
Will You Be My Bitch For The Day?
$22.00
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